Unfortunately, my time as a 6th grade math teacher is over. I am moving to another state to go to grad school, and I am leaving my hilarious students behind.
So without further ado, I give you my last blog post (for a while at least). Here are all the quotes that I can remember that haven't made the blog yet.
Edith (comes up to me with Elizabeth): Guess who is dating Tyler.
Ms. B: Ummm, hmmmm. Elizabeth?
Edith: OMG, how did you know?!?!?
Ms. B: Just a guess.
Elizabeth: Well, duh. It's pretty obvious. Everyone knows.
Edith: Everyone knows??
Edith: Does Tyler know?
Mr. B (science teacher): Yeah, I am doing the P90X program, and I am supposed to go home and take pictures of myself naked from the waist up so I can see how much progress I make.
Ms. B: Oh, interesting. So you don't want to go to get ice cream with us?
Mr. B: Nah, I've got to take the nakie pics.
(Child walks by.)
Ms. B: Oh my gosh, I think that kid just heard you say that.
[one month later]
Ms. B: Hey, do you want to go to lunch with us today?
Mr. B: Oh, I wish, but I have to take nudie pics this evening.
(Child walks by.)
Ms. B: Oh my gosh, the SAME kid just heard you say that.
Madison: Ms. B, I like it when you wear purple. It makes your eyes stand out.
Victor: Ms. B, look at this place on my arm. (points to bruise-looking spot on forearm)
Ms. B: Wow, Victor, how did that happen?
Victor: I got bored at church so I gave myself a hickey.
Katie: [crying] Ms. B, I don't know what to do!
Ms. B: What's wrong?
Katie: My library book is over due!!!
Corvin: Ms. B! I met your friend Dr. Jones! She was my doctor!
Ms. B: Oh, really? Oh, Corvin, you are so lucky. Dr. Jones is so fun! She is one of my CLOSEST friends.
Corvin: [accusingly] She said you were her BEST friend.
Sam: Ms. B, I had so much fun on Pi Day! I went home and bought a pi t-shirt and pi ice cube trays!!!
Sandra: [to Mrs. R, another teacher] Mrs. R, you're so lucky. All the cool teachers eat lunch in your room!